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025 -- [Action || Voice]
[When Shikamaru heads down to Asuma's apartment Monday morning, he finds it empty of everything but Kurenai's things and a silver lighter standing on the table. It's wrong, but he doesn't give in to the false hope.
Of course it would stay. Even though Shikamaru gave it back to him, the lighter stopped being Asuma's the moment he picked it off his dying body.
Kurenai must've stepped out before it happened. She's a ninja, and not so senseless to have left the door wide open and run off in her grief. And so he waits for her, and tries to find his words.
After he leaves Kurenai, he has to tell Ino. Team 8 he'll find in person too - he has a request for them on top of this. It's been too long since they've heard a stir from their enemies.]
[It's well past midnight before an announcement comes, after he's made this post and spent a few hours going over the discussions there. When people are either busy with the information he gave them, or asleep.
He smokes a cigarette on his way back to his apartment in the night air, putting it out before he steps into the building, his posture falsely relaxed until he steps into his own room.]
Sarutobi Asuma is gone. [There's a pause and- no, he doesn't think it was mentioned.] Also, Haruno Sakura returned to her world a few weeks ago, for anyone who knew her.
Funnily enough, I haven't seen that masked Akatsuki guy in a while either...
[Too many people to filter that too. It's vague enough, but anyone who needs to know should get what he means. It would have been better news if he'd known before.
He'll answer journal comments in the morning.]
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Not too sure about that. [Shikamaru has done heavy conversation like this before, and handled it well. He even took Naruto out of his huge funk back home.]
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The last week has probably been the worst, though. He took up the duty of playing decoy and watched someone following his lead get killed, only to come back to find out Temari died too. She's still not back. He spent four days poisoned in the clinic too anxious to sleep properly, and now... there's all this.
There's nothing he wants more right now than to not think of that stuff. At the same time, he knows it was only so long this could remain a normal conversation. Still, he yawns purposefully and tries to look bored.]
[Action]
Naruto leans back a bit more, making sure not to fall back in his seat but also to relax.]
You can't just sit there tryin' not to talk about it when you didn't even try sayin' you were alright when I asked. Gotta talk about it eventually, right? [Better sooner than later. Get it out, all that crap.]
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I don't see the point. [He shrugs.] I won't lie about how I feel, but even if it hurts now, eventually I'll move on from it. So it's not like I need to dwell on the bad.
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[There's so many people who ended up dwelling on terrible things with reckless abandon and nearly destroyed themselves because of it all piling up. Nagato's a good example.]
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But no, Naruto actually raises a point. His own progress has been less than stellar... probably because he hasn't been able to catch a break, but it could be other things. He tries to process it. Probably over-analyzes it. But he can't say he's sure.
He drinks what's left of the ramen broth, to give himself something to do.]
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If it weren't for you and Iruka-sensei, I'd probably still be dwellin' on Ero-sennin's death. [And where would they be then?]
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And it's because of that that Shikamaru can't go with the first retort that comes to mind: that that was different, because Naruto needed the help then. He puts the cup down.
Everyone needs help sometimes, though. He knows this, but he shakes his head.]
If this is about paying me back for that or something, it's not necessary.
[Action]
S'not about payin' you back. [You don't try and pay someone back for something like that. It's just something you stay really grateful for, because paying it back would be like you weren't grateful for their actions anymore.] Just tryin' to help out a friend and comrade.
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But it's not like he knows what to offer him here, either. What's there to help? What does he offer? If he knew what to say to get out of this, he would, but he doesn't.]
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Only it's not. For Naruto, it is, but everytime Shikamaru thinks he's done enough, he can see how futilely wrong he is.]
...I want to learn how to make a shadow clone.
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For real? What for?
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I wasn't there. So long as I'm not there, it will never be enough.
Maybe that will change if I can be in two places at once.
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... You sure about this? We can start trainin' whenever you want.
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I'm positive. Soon as... ["Soon as Temari comes back." But by this point, he's not sure if she will. And maybe that's for the best.]
...Soon. I'll let you know.
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Gotcha. I'm always free.
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Aa, that's right. If it's for that, then I won't let you down.
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That goes double for me! I'm not gonna let you down with crappy teachin'!
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[Awful as he feels... this is the first time in a week he's felt like there's something he could do to change. A goal he could touch. It's a good feeling.]
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