endgames | 028 -- [Voice || Action]

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028 -- [Voice || Action]

Hi. [The journal feed starts unceremoniously.] Noticed the village is getting back into the swing of things. Either that or those who are sulking are doing so more quietly. Good luck with that, whichever.

But hey. I'm looking for a lighter that I misplaced. Anyone comes across it, lemme know. Thanks.

[/end voice]

[Through the afternoon and evening, Shikamaru can be found in various places around the village: digging through things in shops, searching through grass and shrubs and so on. He hasn't been around the village much in the last two days, busy elsewhere with his deer.

Now it almost seems like he's making up for it. One minute you might walk past him digging through the trash behind a building, only to go in to find he's inside already (probably asking if the place has a lost and found). Someone's busy.]

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[Shikamaru takes that with an 'oof' and falls on his rear. ...He doesn't really explain either, just watches him go with a blank look before reaching forward to collect the lighters that were dropped. He's lost in his head for the moment, in some internal dialogue. Threadlike, it is laced in shame.]

[It takes Silver another moment... But then he puts two and two together.

That isn't his actual lighter.

...With a sigh, Silver sits back down, half facing Shikamaru but looking at nothing in particular. And for a moment, he's silent.]

I met Murkrow when I was seven in Goldenrod City. Huge city. The biggest one I know. [But he feels like he needs to share something.]

He was the second Pokémon I ever caught. He had a stash of shiny items- jewelery, tin cans, aluminum, you name it. His stash was on one of those emergency staircases they have on the edge of apartment buildings in alleyways. I was eating there with Sneasel.

He headbutted me off of it. I was stubborn, so I challenged him. He was fearless and eager to rise up to the challenge. That's why I caught him. [This is going somewhere. Really.]

[Well it's not like he's going anywhere. Shikamaru nods mutely, taking mental notes (Silver's not the type to share stuff so easily) and continuing to pick up the lighters. He can't hold them much better than Murkrow despite having fingers, so he's arranging them in a row to put away later.]

[He starts folding his knees up at this point, trying to rest on them. He's still not really looking at anything in particular, and a smile starts to creep up on his face.

It's not a happy one. It's never a happy one.]

He was strong from the beginning. Strong, stubborn, unyielding. Loved to pick fights. He was perfect.

...You remember how I was when you saw me as a kid, right? I didn't trust anyone but my big sister. I still have a hard time trusting people. [...] Other than Sneasel, I didn't trust any of my Pokémon either. I didn't mistreat them, but I kept myself distanced from them and never gave them any affection or praise. I had a goal at the time, and I was too caught up in it to realize what I was doing wrong. I cared about him, but never wanted him to see it. It was too dangerous.

And it hurt him. He desperately tried to help me. To get nothing wrong. He got worked up and nervous. He'd get really frustrated and upset any time he failed- or any time there was something he couldn't do. He tried his hardest just to get me to notice and care about him. It was eating away at his heart.

I learned my lesson when I was eleven, and he's a lot better now, but... He still hates to accept that he can't do something. I have to reassure him a lot, especially if he loses.

He won't be happy until he finds your lighter. That's just the way he is.

[That sounds like a terrible way to get stronger, Shikamaru thinks, too used to bribes and encouraging words as with Asuma. Too used to kindness and friendship, because he learned that from Chouji, and for the longest time it was the only thing that could make his friend strong.

He doesn't begrudge Silver for it. It goes unspoken that whatever happened in that Time Before wasn't a good reflection of him. Even before this story, Shikamaru could tell you he's grown past it.

He could also tell you that it's probably weighing heavily on Silver now, just as Shikamaru's lost memories from that experiment are hanging over him. They have their different reasons, but in the end it's the same.

...It's a lot easier to talk about the bird. Some things are better unsaid. The bird has as many problems as the rest of them.]

I figured he'd tried enough. I've already put one animal through the ringer for this. It's one thing when it's just me.

What would you do if the situation was reversed? If someone you cared about lost something precious and sentimental to them?

I'm not an animal.

[That he made a mistake goes unsaid, but in it's own way it's an admittance to that. Animals from his world aren't like Pokemon. There are Summons, but they're nominally rarer.

Rikumaru is one of the smartest animals he knows, but even he will let things go. In that way animals have their other concerns.]

Neither is Murkrow. [He feels the need to draw that line. Murkrow isn't anything like one of the animals here. Sneasel is more intelligent and perceptive than he is. They look similar to animals, but that's where the similarities stop.]

Yeah. [Of course he gets that now.]

[...And with that, he goes quiet. He's not sure what else to add. All he can do now is wait.]

[Once the lighters are lined up - and he's barely even looking anymore - Shikamaru pulls a bag from inside his vest and starts to collect them in it, two at a time. He doesn't say anything this entire time, still considering what he wants to do.]

He'll find us if we move from here?

Edited 2012-10-08 20:42 (UTC)

He'll probably check your apartment first. [Yes. Yes he will.]

[Wordlessly, Shikamaru finishes his task. Standing slow, he slings the bag over his shoulder and turns around.]

Walk with me.

Edited 2012-10-08 20:58 (UTC)

[...Okay. He springs right up onto his feet, ready to follow Shikamaru.]

[He doesn't actually have anything to say, but he figures they could both use the company. So back the way they came it is. He might stop briefly when they encounter the area Rikumaru hangs in - he butts heads with him, playful even - to thank him for looking. But from there it's back round to CH1.]

[The company is both good and bad. It's nice to be around someone. He has that inherent instinct to want company.

But it leaves him to think. And thinking- especially now- is dangerous.

It's alright if you don't remember anything. You have a pretty bad memory in the first place. You get your facts mixed up all the time.

Was he always this close to Shikamaru? Was he closer? Farther away? Can he trust him? It's hard to think about. It's hard to think about anything. And it leaves him very obviously troubled.

He looks at Rikumaru and Shikamaru, but he doesn't really pay attention to it. You get your facts mixed up all the time. Maybe it's true. Maybe it's not. He doesn't know. And that's a problem.]

[Hey so we're at the door of the building now, which Shikamaru props open with a foot. You coming along or what?

Oblivious to that internal dialogue, obviously. But maybe not as much as you'd think.]

[Yeah, yeah, he's coming.]

[Good, good.

But since there's no elevator yet, stairs it is. And fourth levelll.

Masaomi is likely out training Ikki or still at the Battle Dome by this point, so. Just them and the cat. Who still hasn't quite forgiven him for letting Linda electrocute him and is glaring from the couch. Shikamaru laughs a little nervously and drops the bag of lighters on the coffee table.]

No Twister this time.

[That's all he says to Silver before slipping off for the spare bedroom. Which is also... extra food supply land. And may be where they keep the cat food.]

[That's just fine. He'll wait where he is. ...And after a moment of consideration, he'll let out Sneasel. Come here, buddy. If nothing else, he without a doubt knows about his Pokémon and how important they are to him.]

[Oh come on. Does he really have to pick?

Well first things first - cat. Shikamaru returns with a can of cat food and pops the lid open, offering it up right to his side. Kenta feasts on it without a glance, thanks very much. But he doesn't hiss when Shikamaru tries to pet him, so he'll count that as getting back on his good side.]

So?

[And 'sup, Sneasel.]

[Good Shikamaru. Good making amends with your cat. ...Granted, he's not sure what happened, but whatever.

Not much man, just enjoying Silver not being a dumbass anymore. ...Well, not as much of a dumbass.]

You pick. [...That's what he's asking, right?]

[Fine.]

Dominoes.

Dominoes?

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